This article is a transcript of the Teen Titans Go! episode "I'm the Sauce" from season 3, which aired on September 3, 2015.

Beast Boy
Billy Numerous
The Brain
Control Freak
Dr. Light
Killer Moth
Kyd Wykkyd
Monsieur Mallah
Mother Mae-Eye
Titans Tower
Plot Point
Rainy Day Activities
This transcript is complete.


Interior. Titans Tower.
Cyborg, Starfire, Raven, and Beast Boy are reading books in the living room.
Starfire: Ah. Ooh.
Cyborg: Hmm. Um-hmm.
Raven: Wow. Mmm-hmm. Oh, yeah, that's really interesting. Oh.
Beast Boy: [Crying.] Why won't they stop hopping on Pop? [Blows nose.]
Robin: [Enters. Gasps.] What is going on here?
Raven: Uh, we're just reading.
Robin: Reading? Not on this beautiful day! You're all going outside! Now!
Starfire: May we first finish the chapters?
Robin: No need! I can tell you how all your books end. Like this! [Takes out flamethrower and burns the Titans and their books.]
Raven: Ow! Why?
Robin throws a bomb on the floor.
Exterior. Titans Tower.
The Titans fall onto the lawn where the couch collapses on them. He jumps down, wearing trunks, applies sunscreen to his face, and relaxes on a lawn chair.
Robin: [Chuckles.] What a beautiful day! And you guys wanted to waste it reading.
A single raindrop lands on Robin's head. He opens his eyes and sees that it is raining.
Robin: [Screaming.] Titans, it's raining! Everyone, to the tower, now! [Throws bomb.]
Interior. Titans Tower.
The Titans are shot into the living room and Robin follows, but the couch lands on top of them again.
Robin: [Pants.] That was close.
Raven: Since it's raining, we're going to go back to reading.
Robin: Why? What is this obsession with reading?
Beast Boy: I'm really worried about Pop. They hopped on him pretty hard, dude.
Robin: [Shaking Beast Boy.] Can't you see it is raining? That means, we have to do rainy day activities.
Cyborg: Those silly boring games you'd never do, unless you were trapped inside?
Beast Boy: Those aren't any fun.
Robin: No, no, no, no, no. We don't do them for fun. We do them, because they are our solemn duty. [Clears throat.] This is where someone is supposed to ask, "Why?"
Raven: We're good.
Robin: Come on! Just ask, "Why?" For me? [Chuckles nervously.] Why?
Cyborg: Not interested, bro.
Robin: It's good! I promise! [Attacks Beast Boy with a staff.] I said ask me why!
Beast Boy: Why? Why?
Robin: Oh, I am so glad you asked, Beast Boy. [Hits Beast Boy once more.] It all starts with rain. Now, does anyone know where rain comes from?
Raven: Ooh, ooh.
Robin: Uh, yes, Raven.
Raven: Well, when water vapor rises, air expands and cools off. The vapor slows and attaches itself to tiny particles in the air. This process continues and the droplets become large enough to be affected by gravity. Thus, making it rain.
Robin That is ludicrous. Where'd you learn that? A book? You see, rain is actually just the tears of all the clouds in the sky. When they get sad, they cry. Which causes it to rain on earth. Once they start crying ... the only way to cheer them up is by staying inside and doing rainy day activities.
Starfire: [Gasps.] The clouds are sad?
Beast Boy: Why didn't you tell us, bro?
Cyborg: We have to cheer them up!
Raven: Whatever it takes.
Robin: [Chuckles.] Now, that's the spirit. [Goes through records and pulls out "Is It Still Raining in Gotham?"] This is how we get a rainy day started, y'all! [Dancing.] Throw your hands up! Uh-huh! Ooh, ooh, that's right! Uh-huh! You ready? [Hoots.] Here it comes! Spaghetti Dance! Ooh, ooh. Let's get cooking. Into the pot I go. Say what? Into the pot I go. Whoo-whoo! It's getting hot. I am getting hot. [Imitates sizzling.] Yikes! I'm all floppy, I'm all floppy! Ooh, ooh. Ah, that's tender. That's how you do the spaghetti dance, yo. Come on, guys! Join in!
Starfire: Friends, I am locked in the cringe position.
Cyborg carries Starfire and follows Beast Boy down the hall.
Raven: I'd love to cheer up the clouds, but not at the expense of our dignity. [Follows Cyborg and Beast Boy.]
Robin: Fine! Leave! I just don't know how I'm going to drink all this chocolate milk by myself.
The Titans stop and turn around.
Starfire: [Gasps.] You have the brown milk?
Robin: Oh, this? The milk monitor brought this from the cafeteria to fuel our rainy day activities. Oh, did you want some? [Holds out a tray of chocolate milk cartons.]
Raven: Yes!
Starfire: Yes, please!
Cyborg, Raven, Beast Boy, and Starfire take a carton and slurp down the milk.
Beast Boy: Ah.
Raven: Mmm ...
Robin: "Mmm", is right. Now, let's go cheer up those clouds!
Beast Boy and Cyborg finish constructing a popsicle stick house. Raven pours a chemical into a baking soda volcano and it explodes on Robin's face. The alarm begins to ring and Raven smiles. Robin and Beast Boy are playing Hangman, but Beast Boy is unable to guess the word for _EAST _OY. The Titans play hide and seek and Starfire finds Robin in one of the kitchen drawers. Cyborg, Starfire, Beast Boy, and Raven sit on the couch with their activities around them and milk cartons littered on the floor.
Beast Boy: [Slurps chocolate milk. Burps. Throws milk carton into the baking soda volcano.] I am loving these rainy day activities, y'all.
Starfire: But, it appears that the clouds are still crying.
Robin: Then, they are sadder than I thought.
Robin presses an app on his tablet to gauge cloud feelings. It calculates that the clouds are super bummed.
Robin: [Gasps.] I've only seen this kind of cumulus despair once before. It wasn't pretty. We have no choice. Y'll all ready for this? [Vocalizes while dancing.] Whoo! Spaghetti dance! Everyone into the pot!
Cyborg: Ugh! I will never do the spaghetti dance. Never! Never!
Robin: Okay. I get it. You're not ready for the spaghetti dance. There is only one other option, but it's dangerous. Heads Up-Seven Up!
The Titans gasp.
Starfire: That is madness. The madness!
Raven: Robin, you are asking the impossible.
Beast Boy: It's too risky, bro.
Cyborg: Even if we wanted to, and that is a big if, we don't have enough people.
Robin: Just let me worry about that.
Interior. Building in Jump City.
Many villains are gathered.
Robin: Attention, criminal filth. Though we may be adversaries on the battle field, today we have a common cause. We need to cheer up those clouds. And I propose a game of Heads Up-Seven Up.
The crowd screams and mumbles.
Robin: Okay. Everyone knows the rules of Heads Up-Seven Up. We start with seven tappers. Everyone else puts their heads down and raises a thumb. The tappers pick one person each. If selected, lower your thumb. When all the tappers are done, everyone raises their head and tries to guess who picked them. Choose correctly, you win. If not, death! I need to know if you're in.
Billy Numerous coughs while everyone else is silent.
Robin: Maybe this will change your mind. [Unveils a large stack of chocolate milk cartons.]
The crowd cheers.
Robin: I need seven tappers, and a whole lot of thumbs. Let's do it.
Robin sees that the clouds are still super bummed. He gives a thumbs-up for the game to start. Cyborg extends his hand and Gizmo unleashes a robot claw and they pick Terra and Starfire, respectively. Raven uses her soul-self to create a finger that hovers over Mammoth, but punches Doctor Light instead. Jinx picks Billy Numerous, Mother Mae-Eye chooses Plasmus, and See-More picks Trigon. Robin's cloud feelings app reports that the clouds are feeling less bummed. Beast Boy, Doctor Light, Billy Numerous, Trigon, Terra and Starfire stand up. Starfire checks the tappers and correctly guesses Gizmo who explodes. Doctor Light guesses See-More, but he shakes his head and the doctor explodes. Billy Numerous and Plasmus correctly guess Jinx and Mother Mae-Eye, respectively, and the tappers explode. Terra lifts a boulder and picks Raven, but she shakes her head and the boulder collapses on her before exploding. The cloud feelings app report that the clouds are feeling good. Robin and Starfire look at the ruined building and see that the clouds are parting.
Starfire: Wonderful, friends! The rain has ceased.
The Titans and villains cheer while drinking chocolate milk.
Interior. Titans Tower.
Starfire, Raven, Cyborg and Beast Boy are sitting on the couch while Robin sits to the side. Behind them, a seagull bumps into the tower's windows and falls.
Cyborg: This might sound weird, but I kind of miss the rain.
Beast Boy: I don't think it's the rain you miss, bro. It's the activities.
Raven: Hey, anyone want to make a log cabin out of popsicle sticks?
Starfire: I shall make the table volcano to demonstrate the science.
Robin: Whoa, whoa, whoa! You can't do that! Rainy day activities aren't supposed to be fun. They're sacred and only to be used to cheer up sad clouds.
Cyborg: He's right.
Starfire: If only the clouds were not filled with the happiness.
Starfire, Cyborg, Raven, and Beast Boy gasp. They crash through the ceiling of the tower.
Exterior. Titans Tower.
The Titans land on the roof and spot a nearby cloud.
Raven: Hey, cloud. Are you a gas or a liquid? Make up your mind.
Cyborg and Starfire: Oh!
Robin: What are you doing? Don't upset that cloud. [Sees the cloud's feelings are bummed out.]
Cyborg: You look like some cotton candy, and not the good, pink kind.
Starfire: [Gasps.] Ooh, the snaps.
The tablet reports that the cloud is angry and it short circuits.
Beast Boy: [Laughs.] Oh, yeah. Here we go. Another rainy day, baby. [Shouts as he is struck by lightning.]
The cloud thunders and grows bigger, gaining lightning bolts for arms. It punches the tower's roof, sending the Titans flying. Starfire lands and shoots star bolts, dissipating the cloud. It reforms and forms into guns, shooting hail.
Beast Boy: Hailstorm!
Raven floats in front of Beast Boy and summons a shield, blocking the hail from harming him. The shield disbands and forms a force field, surrounding the Titans. The cloud growls and punches the force field.
Cyborg: We can't fight it!
Raven: [Slaps Cyborg.] Of course, we can't. It's a cloud.
Robin: Titans, there is only one rainy day activity powerful enough to soothe this raging thunder head.
Cyborg: Oh, no.
Robin: Y'all ready for this? [Vocalizes and dances.] Whoo! Spaghetti dance! Come on, everyone. Wiggle with me. One noodle will never be enough. It's the only way!
Beast Boy: [Sighs.] Ha! [Joins Robin and babbles.] I am a piece of pasta!
Starfire: [Flies to Beast Boy and Robin.] Look upon me! I, too, am the noodle.
Robin: Yeah, you are. Now, get wiggly with me.
Starfire joins Beast Boy and Robin.
Raven: And, I am the sauce. [Joins the others.]
The force field disbands. The cloud stops in mid-punch, mesmerized by the spaghetti dance.
Robin: It's working. Just a little more. Cyborg?
Cyborg: No, thank you.
Beast Boy: We can't do it without you, bro!
Cyborg: I just don't think I can live with myself.
The cloud becomes angry again.
Robin: If we don't make it out, I want you all to know, this is the finest bowl of spaghetti ever served.
Cyborg: [Joins the others.] What's spaghetti without a ... [Head detaches and rolls across the Titans' shoulders.] Meatball!
Beast Boy: Wiggle it like a noodle! [Babbles.] Wiggle it like a noodle!
The cloud gasps and begins laughing. The Titan stop dancing and watch the cloud laugh. It chokes and bursts into a rainbow that extends over Titans Tower.
Starfire: The cloud has retreated to his happy place.
Robin: Well done, Titans. Like true heroes, you put your dignity aside for the greater good.
Beast Boy: Yeah! That's how a noodle do!
The Titans continue performing the spaghetti dance.
Episode ends.